Thursday, December 15, 2016

Stay in the Game


Hey everyone and welcome back! This week I want to share some words of encouragement with you all. I can't lie; these are more so words of encouragement to myself. In the midst of working on finalizing my holiday card designs, I've somehow found myself falling into the trap of self-doubt, overthinking life, and over analyzing myself and my actions. I know what I want in life, yet find myself questioning my desires or feel that they’re too big of a goal to attain. I've finally accepted that my ultimate goal in life is to open my own design studio. During my years in college, I dabbled with the idea but was lacking full commitment and belief in myself to get to that point.

Though I've been actively working on myself, gaining confidence each day, and being more mindful, I do have days where I feel extremely low and all the positive vibes I summon don’t help me. I start to feel mediocre and that the efforts put to reaching my goals are futile. It dawned on me that even with all the self-help books, meditation, yoga sessions, finished tasks/goals, a part of me still doesn't believe in myself. It’s a grim way to envision your life, especially when all energy is being put to feel the opposite of this. I ask myself what got me to this point? How is it that I can be on the right track one minute, and bawling my eyes out from frustration with my circumstances the next?

In order to get by, I must continue to keep in mind is that moments like this are inevitable and are okay; what matters is not letting myself dwell on those moments for too long. Like I've said before and I'll say again, I don't have all the answers. What I do know is that beating myself up about getting off track my goals or letting negative thoughts overwhelm me solves nothing and only sets me back. It's hard to stay optimistic when I feel that I’m in a pool of negativity and bored out of my mind from the repetition of my everyday work. It's hard to tell yourself to keep going when the uncertainty of what the future holds scares the crap out of you, but I've heard the saying, “If your goals don't scare you, then you’re not reaching high enough,” and I am a believer in that. Seeing the progress I have made in a short period is refreshing, and having a great support system that is elated to hear my active pursuit of a career in graphic art has kept me going.


It's important to remember that doubts are inevitable and a part of being human. I may have days that I’m not a believer in myself, but this is all part of the self-growth /healing process. At this stage, I've done all that I can do and have to take things one step at a time. I've been reading The Creative Cure, A Do-It-Yourself prescription for happiness. I'm currently on week 5 of a 7-week course designed to dive deep within myself, and though it can be mentally exhausting to keep positive all the time, thus far the steps have been helping.  I don't know what the future holds for me, but if I focus on the things I have control over versus stressing over uncertainty, I pray in time life will stir me into the right direction. I hope these words of encouragement help you as much as they help me. Till next time!

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